Handling a Marriage can be tough. While it comes almost seamlessly for some couples, others tend to struggle for years or even break apart due to accruing difference. Every individuals has his own personality, a different way to look at things and react. There can be no ‘ one size fits all’ marriage advice for every couple since each couple is unique.
But after an observation of a lot of struggling marriages, we found out, that all through this phase of differences and constant fighting, what stood common for everyone were a few set of habits that a lot of women are guilty of doing. These habits are extremely bad for your relationship, they can slowly and unknowingly destroy your husband and suffocate your marriage. If you are guilty of doing any of these too, you should stop right away.
6 Ways You’re Unknowingly Destroying Your Husband
1. Not Being Happy With What He Can Provide.
A lot of women find it difficult to accept it if their husbands cannot meet their various needs. Basic or luxury. Some women these days find it difficult to appreciate what their husbands can provide, if it does not meet all their demands and wishes. They constantly feel bad about the one wish that their husbands could not fulfil. They keep on complaining about it to their husbands and keep making them feel bad about it.
If you are one of these women, you are slowly destroying your husbands self worth in his own mind. He will feel devalued and unimportant. Slowly it can lead to confidence erosion and affect him at his work life. If you keep on feeding a thought of his failure to provide, into his mind every day, He may permanently change into a person he with low confidence and self esteem.
Although it is okay to sometimes genuinely show your concerns, make sure you do not get into a habit of blaming him for things that you both couldn’t afford.
Instead tell him how to manage whatever you people have, learn to increase your combined effort to meet your demands. It is a group effort. And if you just concentrate on his failure to earn more you should also think about your failures to save whatever little you could.
2. Constantly Focusing On The Negatives
Women are usually have very simple demands, and when your partner even fails to understand them you tend to feel really frustrated. We know it can be natural. But constantly focusing on his negatives and telling him on his face every single day will only lead to a suffocating marriage. Sure we understand he forgot to mend the pipes again or even forgot to pay the electricity bills. But tell yourself that who doesn’t forget? Try to evaluate and remember his positives more. Remind yourself of the last good thing he did. It doesn’t have to be grand. A simple something. Make yourself realise his good points too. For a happy marriage, your state of mind is really important.Constant nagging can badly damage and your marriage. It can be the start of destroying your husband. Try to focus on your strong points as a couple. Always remember men love to come back to a happy women.
3. Putting Him Far Down On Priority
One of the most unknowing ways you’re unknowingly destroying your husband is by making him a very low priority in your life. You may do it intentionally or not. But women who cannot find time for the man in their life will surely fail as a partner.
We, women, have to single handedly manage the entire house and kids. We understand that it can be a real pain to take time out of the busy life and motherhood. You also may have careers that demand time, probably even friends and family that need constant support from you. But, all through this if you are leaving behind your most important partner then you are making it hard on your own self.
Every partner deserves his wife/husbands attention, there is a reasons we are called life partners right? So if you are keeping your partner as low priority and slowly he is getting sidelined in your busy life of different roles you are slowly destroying your husband’s affection for you. This can be an alarming sign of a bad marriage.
4. Withholding Physical Attention
The easiest way in which you can be unknowingly destroying your husband and killing your marriage is by with holding physical attention. Women tend to do it a lot, yes we do. Whenever there is a fight, no matter how much you would want it to but you withhold sex. When you keep on doing this it will slowly wear him out and he will become okay with it. Slowly he won’t even come after trying to make you happy after a fight.
The road is only downhill from here, Sex should never be used as a tool. It is a great way to bond with your husband, emotional and spiritually. It is something that should be kept out a fight always.
Do not behave cold and disinterested after a fight. Makeup soon and if he convinces you try and become happy quick. He will appreciate you more and you can have a better married life.
5. Being Cryptic And Unclear But Expect a Lot.
Sure, we would love for them to understand us, And who wouldn’t love if they understood our hints. But take it as you like, men just cannot understand our cryptic signals and hints.
They may not understand your hints. They understand clear and simply put word the best. If you expect them to pick up on your hints and deliver exactly what you hope then you are sure destroying your husband and marriage. It is very easy to feel disappointed when our expectation aren’t met. We know the pain. But do not put the burden of understanding your unclear messages on them. It is not in their DNA and no matter how well you teach them they can always potentially forget everything. This is one of the things that destroy a marriage, stay away from this road.
6. Taking No Effort
Taking no effort can be put as a number 1 cause for suffocating a marriage. There is no point in first committing the mistake and then wondering “oh! That really ruined my marriage”.
Taking no efforts in a lot of things can be really destroying your husband and you won’t even know how slowly it happens. It is definitely one of the slow killers of a relationship.
It can start with you feeling comfortable wearing pajamas all day, slowly you don’t want to take a bath, and later you even stop caring about looking pretty. It is not just about the appearance bit. A lot of women stop making efforts in so many regards. You don’t want to learn sharing the TV even once, you complain you just don’t want to watch his game even when he seems so excited about it. Or even about your day out. It is just grocery stops or mandatory social events.
This bad habit can slowly creep on you. Do not get relaxed and start taking things easy. Always make an effort for your partner, look good for him, go out every once in a while take time out to understand his interests. It is a two way street the more you give the more will come back.
Even though you might not have realised how simple things and easy habits like these can be so bad, it actually turns out that this can suffocate the life out of your marriage and slowly also might be destroying your husband. If you value your bond and the relationship with him make sure you do not follow these ways in which you are unknowingly destroying your husband and suffocating your marriage. We hope you have a great and happy life with your partner.