India is a place that is still rich in traditions, customs and caste variation. Yes, people mainly the adults even now believe that marriage among their caste is the best thing for their children. While the world is moving ahead in god speed, there are people back in India who are stringent and don’t want their children to have a inter-caste love marriage. Well, there is no use in blaming our parents because they have been brought up like that and they were not exposed to social media when they were growing up. Social media has brought in a lot of good light on love marriage and intercaste love marriage or inter-religion love marriage.
There could be a hundred reasons for your parents to disapprove of your marriage, but even if you find one good reason to convince them, you should go ahead and do that. Couples nowadays don’t even seek the approval of their parents for the second time. If they say no the first time, they elope or get married illegally. Instead of doing that, there are 5 main ways in which you can easily convince your parents. If your parents still don’t get convinced, you can take the second alternative to this. But without trying, none of the inter-caste love marriage will work even after the marriage. Lot of couples think that marriage is the problem. But what comes after marriage is the real problem. Not acceptance, anger, revenge and so many other emotions will lead to unwanted instances which you can easily avoid. So, here are some tips to convince your parents and accept for your Intercaste love marriage.
Top Tips to Make Your Parents Accept for Your Marriage
1Be prepared
It is very important that you prepare yourself for the worst. Yes, when you prepare for the worst, when things happen, you will not feel surprised or shocked. Prepare a list of things you want to tell them before you start discussing with them. Even if you want to write down few of the points, it is better to avoid confusion. They might probably think and start worrying about what other people in your family might think, you relatives will come into the place suddenly from nowhere. You should make sure you are able to answer all the questions they pose to you. If you are confident about all the answers, you don’t have to worry about anything at all. They will be emotionally stuck and they will probably use that as one way to get you out of it. Be strong at all instances because you have made a promise to the love of your life. Never get angry, agitated or emotional when they ask you random questions. There is room for anger and expected irritation following the entire discussion. So, be prepared even for that. If you want, you can even practice it beforehand so that you don’t mess it up with your parents in front of you.
2Have backup evidence
It isn’t wrong for you to take instances and evidences of the number of people who are happy married to the same caste and are unhappy in their relationship. While you do that, you should also make sure you take examples of people who have had inter-caste love marriages who are happy and enjoying their life. It is fine to do some research before you break open this to your parents. This will make them a tad stronger than you think and can be one of the reasons why they will get convinced. Discuss these kinds of things to your parents. Give out reasons why you love the person and show them examples of how people can be happy even if they are not of the same caste. This will make them see ahead of the situation and they might put your happiness in front.
3A helping hand works
If you want you can very much bring along your friend, sibling, your boyfriend himself or someone from the family to convince your parents. But I would tell you to do it yourself first. If that doesn’t work, you can turn to someone from your family because that way they will see and hear what others have to say. It is important that this other person you bring into your love life is someone your parents would believe and trust. So, always turn to someone who is close to bothyou and your parents. That way they will understand both the sides and talk for both of you.
4Try Try and have patience
Just because you are in this generation and you probably know more than your parents, it doesn’t mean that they have to accept everything you say. They will have their own doubts, their confusions and their decisions. So, you have try try and have patience. You can’t just say it today and expect them to be okay with the whole thing by tomorrow. They will need their space. So, make sure you give them the space and talk something else with them. Talking about the same thing, discussing and waiting for answers will not work every time. Have some patience and let them think for a while.
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5It boils down to you
Remember that everything boils down to you. Even you are not sure 0.1% about the relationship or whether it will work out, never take it to parents. But if you think that this will work out 100%, don’t stop trying or give up easily. Don’t let your parents manipulate you with their emotional ride. That doesn’t mean you should respect their advices and discussions. Don’t lose your confidence in your love. If you are confident, your parents will see the positives and eventually accept.
-Pavithra Ravi
